


those aren't meant to bend

by FreezingKaiju



Category: Neon Genesis Evangelion
Genre: ? sorta?, Alternate Universe - Fantasy, F/F, Hurt/Comfort, Knight Asuka, Major Character Injury, Minor Character Death, Princess Rei, Suicidal Thoughts, because rei is Like That
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-08-21
Updated: 2020-08-21
Packaged: 2021-03-06 16:55:52
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,207
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/26022286
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/FreezingKaiju/pseuds/FreezingKaiju
Summary: crown princess rei of the ikari bloodline attempts to sacrifice herself to save her "loyal" knight, sir soryu. said knight is both exasperated and confused. they share a discussion. asuka is bad at healing in more than one sense.
Relationships: Ayanami Rei/Souryuu Asuka Langley
Comments: 8
Kudos: 34
Collections: Femslashgelion 2020





	those aren't meant to bend

“Cure.”

Nothing.

“Cure!”

Still nothing. Asuka smacked the staff. “CURE!”

Despite the wounds to her dainty, fragile form (maybe Asuka’s perception’s colored on that, but she had the right to be), the princess’s voice was as level and empty as ever. “Sir Knight, you will not heal me by screaming at someone else’s implement.”

“Shut up and be grateful!” Asuka snarled, then slammed her mouth shut. Sir Kaji’s words echoed in her mind;  _ Hold back a bit, kiddo, that mouth’ll get you killed one of these days. Just tell me how you feel when it’s all said and done, kay? _

The memory was useless. She can’t go vent her anger to his grave. He’s not there to listen anymore. 

The princess looked oddly unaffected by the statement. She turned her head, blood still trickling down her face and tinting her makeshift bandages a rusty red. In the back of her mind, Asuka wondered where someone who never lifted a finger in her life got this level of pain tolerance.

“Fine. It’s not Cure-ing. Okay.” Asuka gritted her teeth, raised the bandit’s staff in the air, and belted synonyms. “CURE! CUREALL! POULTICE! PHYSIC! MEND! BALM! HEAL--”

A wave of blue light pulsed from the staff. Asuka felt her grip weaken, felt the sudden spike of pain from her wounds suddenly  _ stitching _ back together, like knives being yanked out all at once. Better, she realized as she stood again, no longer limping. Better, but still. Ow. 

The princess was silent, but the flow of blood seemed to have stopped. Asuka  _ carefully _ chucked the staff aside, stepped back over to her liege, her charge, the woman she was SUPPOSED to protect ( _ though she can’t stand her, she can’t stand her she can’t FUCKING stand her _ ). At this point in their journey her dress was about as tattered as Asuka’s memory scarf. 

She didn’t mind. The princess insisted that, that she did not mind a thing. Asuka’s discovered that she didn’t seem to mind a single goddamn thing aside from eating meat. Were it not for that, she’d be completely and utterly a  _ doll. _

A doll that remained shockingly unbroken.

The scene flashes before her eyes. Three against one, two bandits and one fellow knight. All swung towards Asuka at the same time. She had the sword, the weapon advantage, but their axes were three, and the princess was unarmed. 

Hands on her shoulders. Yanking back.

The princess, her charge, vaulting over her to take the blow. The knightly goon pulling back, the bandits too, they probably didn’t want to harm their quarry. It was too late though; their axes bit shallow, but bit they did. When Asuka rushed forward to finish her startled foes, her liege had crumpled to the ground. Yet out of the corner of her eye, Asuka had seen the princess plant her hands in the dirt and try to climb back up. 

Asuka shuddered at the memory, then glared at the princess, at her stupid perfect glassy face now barely cracked, at the intensity with which she stared up into the nothingness of the gathering dusk. 

She coughed. “My liege,” Asuka began, “beg pardon. Why did you... why did you  _ do _ that?”  _ Why did you save me, why did you nearly die, why did you bother to try and stand again? _ “Do you doubt me? Is my protection unsatisfactory for the perfect princess?!”

And the princess looked, eyes alight with something more than that stained-glass nonexpression, met Asuka’s eyes, and stated, “I am disposable, Sir Knight. And you are not.”

Disposable. Asuka wanted to throw something. How the fuck dare she-- how  _ dare _ she imply that... that Asuka was...  _ important _ . More important than her. A princess,  _ the _ princess. Asuka knew  _ she’d  _ be beheaded for even  _ implying _ that. Right?

“What. In the names of the fucking gods. Are you talking about.”

“Have you ever died, Sir Knight?”

“What?! No!”

A sigh from the princess, one of relief, bizarrely, horrifically. “...what a luxury that could be.”

“What are you talking about.”

“To be dashed upon the cobbles for the last, close your eyes and know your life will not continue, know you will not awake tomorrow in a new form ready for fresh torture, to know--”

“Spare me your stupid poetry! Am I a bardic advisor with a sword to you?”

The princess’s tone, if possible, deadpanned further . “...you asked to know me, Sir Knight.” 

Asuka yanked at her hair. She wanted to scream. “I. I meant more like. I would appreciate if, if you started to see me as a  _ person! _ And not...not some grand hero of legend. Clear the fairy dust from your eyes and look at me! Not at some idealized knight you wish you were escorted by!”

The princess shifts her eyes to Asuka, red gaze piercing her own. She could swear those eyes are cursed. They always captivate her. Some emotion dances within, despite the princess’s lack of expression. “I...have never seen you as anything but a person, Sir Knight. You misunderstand. I see you as far more of a person than I could ever be. Maybe...that is why I envy you. You are real.”

“It’s an insult to my eyes to say you’re fake.”

The princess’s laugh rung hollower than a Hallow's Eve gourd. Asuka wondered whether she really did possess some tiny fire within her. 

“Dear Sir Knight--”

“Stop calling me Sir Knight.” Asuka ignored the ‘dear’.

“If I become accustomed to your name, when we return to the castle, I might speak it aloud.”

Asuka _tch_ ed, arms crossed, a shield premature. “Is my name that horrid? Afraid it’ll sully your perfect tongue?”

The princess sighed, closed her eyes, and spoke with the certainty of an observation on the sea’s wetness. “If the king discovers I have bonded with you, we will be executed.”

Asuka did not respond. 

How could she? 

How does one...how does one respond to such a sureness in mutual destruction? 

What could she do, but adjust her armor, sit down beside the princess, glance up at the stars she’s so intently watching, and return to staring back at her? Staring with a changed worldview, at a scar on her temple, another behind her ear, deep scars on her throat always covered by that stupid necklace?

The princess filled the silence Asuka has left stretch. “I will be replaced. You will be missed.” 

All tension dissolved into a bitter laugh, a bark, a series of gruff chortles that left Asuka emptier and emptier the more she let out. “Who the fuck’s left alive to miss me?”

“I would.” 

“...Maybe we don’t come back then. Maybe we find a place in that city, whatever-it’s-called, maybe we find a place and stay. Or maybe we steal an airship. Find an island. Join another kingdom. Maybe...maybe any one of a thousand little things under the fucking sun is possible other than just ‘go right back with no problems, get guillotined by your dad’.” She scoffed. “Maybe in one of these infinite possibilities you could take my hand, call me Soryu, and ride off into the dusk.”

Rei’s hand, somehow, found Asuka’s. The knight deigned, for the moment, not to pull away. 

“Maybe someday, Sir Knight.”

**Author's Note:**

> Written for Femslashgelion 2020, gift for muffinmoonn on tumblr!


End file.
